ergh!!!

what the heck am i doin man?haix.. i kind of regret not talkin to him today... i hate myself for doin that... wth... having coldwar nia... wahahaa.... this all sucks.... haix... i miss him... hahah.... i dunno if this is too early to say... i am feeling more and more dangerous with jui peng. although i treasure this friendship... but i think it is a bit too much... haix.... haha... sometyms you just have to give sumthing up... haix... can he dun hang up my calls? it is damn annoying and heart-breaking at the same time... now my heat aches a bit but i noe i still got a test so i can cry after that... haha... not really in a good mood... maybe will try to call him later in the night bahx.. i think it is time to change my childish ways and grow up... be friendly to him... hmm... come to think of it i seldom talk to him at work... shld tok to him more... haha.... i miss him alr... haha... not goin to see him for the next dunno how many days.. i think i want to go holland v eat katong laksa... haahaaa.... maybe will ask him along if not weiting... i dun even noe he is free anot... haix.. what the heck... i wanna die sia.... i am so sorry.. haha.. hope he gets his joy hanging up my calls.... haix... wahaha... siao da bo... i am so goin to be patient and not let anyone stand between us... haha... i noe it sounds stupid.. but i do not want to lose him.. i have lost one not one more... it sucks to noe later that the person like you later in life and that you like him... but he is now attached... if i had taken jennifer words, i think we would be togethere le... too bad... no fate.. haha... hope martin and i will have both fate and destiny..... haahaa... i wanna cry... and i dun dare call him now... haix... hope corina will not disturb... i dun like this... haix... i dun want to have any pro but i dun think there will be any chance that there wont be any haix.. like now.. all because of my own doings... hahaa..... stupid me ... miss him nia.. the fear of losing him is like so irritating... haha....